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This post is a guide to becoming a first time grandma and is packed full of new grandma tips.
When I was given the gift of my grandson, my life changed drastically and I have loved every second of it. Everyone told me that there is no love like the love for your grandchild. There are no words to describe it until you first hold your baby’s baby. Its truly a love like no other.
When I was preparing to become a Grandma, I wanted to be the best I could possibly be. I searched and searched for blogs, books, guidance or anything I could find and there just isn’t much out there. I’m no expert and in one short year, I’ve already made my share of mistakes, so I thought I’d share some things I’ve learned.
This post is a guide to becoming a first time grandma and is packed full of new grandma tips.
New Grandma Tips:
Our kids are a lot smarter than we were
With the invention of the internet, our kids have a wealth of knowledge at their fingertips at all times. When my kids were little, I owned a successful daycare and preschool. I thought, “My kids have it made”. All they have to do it ask me (the professional). I had all the advice my daughter could ever need. Then I was confronted with proof that a lot of my advice was inaccurate and outdated and plain wrong!
My daughter can pull articles and statistics on any given subject from a team of renowned doctors who know a LOT more than I know at any given moment. That can leave you feeling not quite as useful as you thought you might be. I have found that a many of the things I did or believed were not the best way or even safe. I feel fortunate that my children have this sea of knowledge with them at all times. So my advice on this subject is to trust your children. They know a lot and can teach us things we only wished we knew when our babies were born.
Let them Struggle!
Everyone’s story is different. When I had my babies, I had very little help. My parents lived many hours away and my in-laws had passed. I’ve been so fortunate to have my daughter and grandson in my home with me for his first year. However, due to my past history, I’ve been OVER-helping! I don’t want my kids to struggle. Even though my intentions are always good, it can leave my daughter feeling frustrated. She wants to learn to do it all herself. We, as their mom, just want to help. Its a good idea to try NOT to fix it all. Let them learn to be the ones to fix the problems until they ask for your help. I have to remind myself of this often!
Try not to spoil them- Even if you really want to!
Back to the internet! Just like our children have a wealth of knowledge at their fingertips, Grandma’s have shopping at theirs! Most of us want to give our new grandbabies the world! All the boutiques with bamboo sleepers and the fancy gadgets that we all wish we would have had are just one click away and delivered to your door as soon as the next day! I’ve also learned this one the hard way.
I’m not here to tell you not to buy your new, precious grandchild gifts. That would just be crazy. What I’d like you to keep in mind is that too many things can be overwhelming for a new or soon to be mom. They have friends and other family that will want to shower them with gifts as well. its easy for most moms to run out of room quickly or just have so much stuff that they already don’t know what to do with. It can also have them feeling like we aren’t letting them develop their own style for their baby.
Time is the best gift we can give them. When you do buy, buy in moderation. Another good idea is ask them if you can be the one to start the baby’s library. Kids can never have too many books and then you get to spend time reading them all to your precious new grandbaby.
Respect their boundaries
This leads us to BOUNDARIES. This is a hard one for me. It all boils down to respect. Just like our mothers all had a different way of doing things that we may not have liked, our children want to do things their way too. It doesn’t make your way wrong. They aren’t saying they don’t like the way you raised them or anything disrespectful to you, they just need to do things their way. Its never a good idea to refuse to follow their rules or wishes.
There have been so many studies to prove that some of our ways were not safe, such as the way I used to fill my baby’s crib with warm blankets and soft animals. It seems so strange to me to see my grandson in his big empty crib with no blankets, but its been proven to be safer. Don’t sneak your grandchild sweet treats if they ask you not to. Respect their decisions about how they want to raise their child just as you wanted to be respected for how you chose to raise yours.
Its easy to want to do things the way we’ve always done them. We say “That’s not how I did it”. Well its not but this is the way they are choosing to raise their child. We can be there when they ask our advice or opinions but we should always respect their wishes and boundaries when it comes to our grandbabies. I could negatively effect your relationship with your child and possibly even keep you from spending time with your grandchild.
I hope some of this helps. Being a grandma is the best thing that has ever happened to me. I can only look forward to watching my children become the best parents and be there for my grandchildren every step of the way. Best wish and lots of love for you and your new grandbaby
This post is a guide to becoming a first time grandma and is packed full of new grandma tips.
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This post is a guide to becoming a first time grandma and is packed full of new grandma tips.
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